She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls…Proverbs 31:15
I love the Proverbs 31 woman she helps me realize so much I can do as a young wife and mother; I realized the error of only having one job while reading her blueprint and lots more.
I have not always been keen on the idea of house helps, I can take care of my children or rather no one can take care of my children like me, that has always been my thought, until God showed me that was an indirect way of saying I do not trust him.
He showed me, I am not to trust people but rather trust God with the people whom I leave with my children, after all the children are God’s own so he will do a better job than even I could.
I came across the Proverbs 31 woman and I realized even the woman of all virtues had not only one but at least two servant girls (the bible said girls) if she saw the need for helps, then what am I thinking? reading this brought an end to feeling guilty at leaving my children for any reason.
I believe if someone is to have helps then the person should be ready to cater for the help’s (young/old) need and equip the help; whenever they leave, they will be useful to themselves and their future homes, at least a secondary education, then a vocational training if you cannot afford a tertiary institution, to me if my children can go to a University, then my help should too (if she wants to).
Your stay in my house should not be wasted years, my contribution in a helps life is not to be viewed as doing the person a favor rather as seed sown whose fruit will be eaten by either me, my spouse, my children, grandchildren or even our lineage. Roots have a way of going deep into the earth and that is what our actions/decisions are – seeds that grow into trees with fruits.
I read a story recently on Facebook where a lady adopted her house help and took her with her children when they were relocating to Ireland, it may have been because she needed her help with the children but she equipped that lady or gave her opportunity to equip herself for her future home, she just got married as a graduate with a job.
I have heard different horror tales of helps and I have also heard different testimonies of good helps but like all human we are inclined to expect the worst, except we train ourselves to look out for the best and also trust God for the best.
I have had two experiences with live-in helps, and I had to let them go, because they were not ready to learn and I am keen on learning especially as my children are going to be seeing and copying most of what they do.
I have had to learn patience too on my path. I remember my husband always telling me: “tell them what you want and do not expect them to know, explain and keep explaining.”
I had to grow and grow. It seems during this growth process, I learnt how to keep quiet and give people room to breathe, give people the benefit of doubt, bite my tongue sometimes rather than say the first thing that pops into my head(I am still growing in this area)
During this growth process, I tried getting helps but I kept getting “wait”
“I am ready Lord, just give me one already!” I prayed impatiently, I even went ahead to look for on my own but doors kept closing. I had to grudgingly wait it out and learn as I wait, but at the point of being overwhelmed I always had support here and there.
I learnt how to pray also for the help God will bring for me when I came across Joel 2:29 where God says: “I will pour out my spirit even on servants, men and women alike.” This I have been holding on to.
Now my prayer is: “God please give me a help filled and activated in the power of the Holy Spirit, who we can learn from and will learn from us, friendly, hardworking and a fast-thinker. She will fit into the fabric of our home in Jesus name. Amen
I have gotten the go ahead and I am filled with expectation as I prepare for her arrival. Testimony loading!!!
What do you think about equipping your help for their tomorrow?
What has been your experience with helps? Good? Bad?
What works for you?
Please share with us so we can dodge some of the potholes